If Jesus Was A Norwegian

I am dedicating todays Video to all my Norwegian Friends. Ringling 5 is the group  that wrote/sings "If Jesus Was A Norwegian".  I actually made this video several years ago, and it has almost 35,000  hits on youtube.com. See, not all my videos are political or about my grandkids.

We used to sing a verse of this song as a child; Jesus Loves the Little Children, All the Children of the World, Indian, Irish, Dutch and Jew, even the little Norwegians too, Jesus loves the little children of the World!
I don't think most people know where all their ancestors came from- I don't. Does it really matter? I do know my mom was a Norwegian, so when I heard this song, I had to put some photos to it and post it on my blog. It is meant to lighten up your day and bring a smile to your face- if it does not, you are too stressed! This one is for my Norwegian Friends- you are special! Below are some of my favorite Norwegian jokes.

Ole, Lars and Sven had been going to the Sons of Norway hall meeting as long as there had been a hall. And every month, wouldn't ya know it, they didn't win a prize in the monthly drawing. That is until the last meeting. Sven was the first one of the three to get his name drawn. won two pounds of spaghetti sauce, four boxes of noodles, and three pounds of swedish meatballs. Ole had his name drawn next. He got himself round trip tickets to Duluth, a nights stay at the Dew Drop Inn and a pair of tickets to see the Inger triplets Polka Ensemble. Ole thought that he had died and gone to heaven. Lars was the last one to have his name drawn, he won a toilet brush. At the next monthly meeting, they sat down together to check out how they had fared for the past month. Sven said "Vell, I had dat pasghetti for tree days. It was so good dat Olga didn't have to cook new for them dere tree days." Ole said "Lena was so happy ven I brought home dem tickets. The trip up to Dulute was nice, we got ta ride da Greyhound, and you know--dey got a built in outhouse on dat dere bus. And da Inger Triplets? If I didn't know better, I'd swear dey vas sisters." Then Ole turned to Lars, and asked him how his prize worked out. Lars looks at them both and says "Dat dere toilet brush was nice, but I tink I'll go back to using paper."

Lena passed away and Ole called 911. The 911 operator told Ole that she would send someone out right away. "Where do you live?" asked the operator. Ole replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive." "Can you spell that for me?" the operator asked. There was a long pause and finally Ole said, "How 'bout if I drag her over to Oak Street and you pick her up der?"

Lars: "Ole, stand in fronna my car and tell me if da turn signals are vorking".
Ole: "Ya, No, Ya, No, Ya, No, Ya, No...."

Lars was staggering home after a night in the tavern. A Lutheran minister saw him and offered to help him get home safely. As they approached the house, Lars asked the minister to step inside for a moment. He explained, "I vant Lena to see who I have been out vith."

Ole died. So Lena went to the local paper to put a notice in the obituaries. The gentleman at the counter, after offering his condolences, asked Lena what she would like to say about Ole. Lena replied, "You yust put 'Ole died'." The gentleman, somewhat perplexed, said, "That's it? Just 'Ole died?' Surely, there must be something more you'd like to say about Ole. If its money you're concerned about, the first five words are free. We must say something more." So Lena pondered for a few minutes and finally said, "O.K. You put 'Ole died. Boat for sale.' "

Ole says to the doctor at Mayo Clinic: "I got a problem. I have a big bowel movement at 6 in da morning every day."
Doctor: "That sounds perfectly normal. Why are you so worried about it?"
Ole: "Yah, but I don't vake up until 7."

Ole, Lena, and little Ole went to the big City for the first time. They were walking down the street and looking in the windows of the big buildings. Little Ole spotted something that caught his eye and ran into a building. Big Ole and Lena followed him. There they all stood in front of a shiny metal door that was cut into a wall of black marble. A chubby, elderly, gray haired lady walked up and pushed a button on the wall next to the door. The door opened and she walked into the little room behind the shiny door. The door closed and the numbers above the door counted up and then down again. The shiny doors opened and a beautiful, well built, young lady walked out.
Little Ole said, "What kind of machine is dat, Pa?"
Big Ole replied, "I don't know little Ole, but push dat button and shove your Ma in der."

Ole's neighbor Sven had a boy, Sven Junior, who came home one day and asked, "Papa, I have da biggest feet in da third grade. Is dat becoss I'm Norvegian?" "No," said Sven, "It's because you're NINETEEN."