Tim Lovelace

Tim Lovelace is a very talented man- I first heard him in a comedy song on the Gaithers called the Fourth Man. He has many comedy videos on youtube and this one caught my attention- his talent at piano playing! I took piano lessons in the 6th grade but have forgotten it all. Check out this video, you will laugh and recogize his impression of many piano player legands. Who says music cannot be fun? And never judge a book by its cover.

At a posh wedding reception in Beverly Hills the pianist falls into the swimming pool. The pianist flails furiously while calling for help, yelling "help me! I can't swim!" One of the other guests who happens to be at the poolside says "So...? I can't play the piano and you don't hear me complaining."

Piano Tuner: I've come to tune the piano.

Music Teacher: But we didn't send for you.

Piano Tuner: No, but the people who live across the street did.

The audience at a piano recital was appalled when a telephone rang just off stage. Without missing a note the soloist glanced toward the wings and called, "If that's my agent, tell him I'm working!"

Don't Sit In My Pew

I am trying to round off  my blogs for the year to even numbers- and noticed I had not posted this one by Tim Lovelace yet. I know seating will be at a premium on Christmas Sunday- so wanted to let you know you can have my seat if needed. See You in Church.

An elderly man in Oklahoma calls his son in New York and says,
"I hate to ruin your day son, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are getting a divorce; 45 years of marriage... and that much misery is enough!"
"Dad, what are you talking about?" the son yells....
"We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the old dad explained. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Hong Kong and tell her!".
Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone.
"Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of this."
She calls her elderly father immediately, and screams at him, "You are not getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, you hear me?" she yelled as she hung up the phone.
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay", he says, "it's all set. They're both coming for Christmas and paying their own air-fare."

The Fourth Man

There is a lot of talk about the 12th man- I am not a big sports fan, but I am a big Southern Gospel Music fan, and I think you will enjoy this song called the Fourth Man by Tim Lovelace from a Gaither Homecoming Video several years ago.  Even if you don't like southern gospel, I am sure you will get a laugh from it. And yes, I knew the fourth man long before there ever was talk of the 12th man.

It was visitor's day at the lunatic asylum. All the inmates were standing in the courtyard and singing "Ave Maria," and singing it beautifully. Oddly, each of them was holding a red apple in one hand and tapping it rhythmically with a pencil.

A visitor listened in wonderment to the performance and then approached the choir. "I am a retired choir director," he said. "This is one of the best choirs I have ever heard."
"Yes, I'm very proud of them," said the conductor.
"You should take them on tour," said the visitor. "What are they called?"
"Surely that's obvious," replied the conductor. "They are the 'Moron Tapanapple Choir'."

A church had a man in the choir who couldn't sing. Several people hinted to him that he could serve in other places, but he continued to come to the choir. The choir director became desperate and went to the pastor.

"You've got to get that man out of the choir," he said. "If you don't, I'm going to resign. The choir members are going to quit too. Please do something."

So the pastor went to the man and suggested, "Perhaps you should leave the choir."

"Why should I get out of the choir?" he asked.

"Well, five or six people have told me you can't sing."

That's nothing," the man snorted. "Fifty people have told me that you can't preach!"

Stutter Song

Everyone has their weakness and strengths- focus on your  strengths and laugh at your problems. Don't judge by first impressions- Tim Lovelace is a very gifted individual. Tim Lovelace has appeared on several Gaither videos, one was called THE 4th MAN that was so funny. I have another blog featuring his piano playing that is very good. This video is called the stutter song that I found on youtube- I needed a good laugh tonight...

· If  a   man  could  make  a  statement in the middle of a forest and  there  is  no  woman  to  hear  him  say  it,  Tell  me; “ Is He Still Wrong?”


A man came into a shop with a 'Salesman Wanted' sign In a window. He went up to the owner and said, "I-I-I w-w-waannn-t the j-joooob-b." "I don't know if this job would suit you because of your speaking impediment," said the owner.

"I h-h-havvve a w-wi-wiiiife and s-s-s-six k-kkkids, iiii-I re-really neeeed thi-thi-this j-j-job!" said the man.

"O.K. Here are three Bibles. Go out and sell them." said the owner.

So the man went out and came back an hour later.

"H-here-sss your m-m-money." said the man. The owner was impressed, so he gave the man a dozen more Bibles and sent him out. The man came back in two hours and said, "Her-ers y-yooour m-m-money."

The owner said, "This is fantastic. You sold more Bibles in three hours than anyone has sold in a week. Tell me, what do you say to the people when they come to the door?"

"W-welllll," said the man, "I r-r-ring the d-door bell, a-a-and s-s-say 'H-Hel-Hello, M-m-maaaaddam, d-d-do you w-w- want t-t t-to buy thi-thi-this B-B-Bible, oooor d-d-do y-you w-w-want m'me t-toooo read it t-t-t-t-to you?"



THE ROBOT
A man walked into a very high-tech restaurant in a fancy hotel. As he waited to be seated, he noticed that the Maitre D' was a robot.
The robot clicked to attention and said, "Sir, there is a one hour wait. I am programmed to converse with you until a table is ready, if you please."
Intrigued, the man said, "OK."
...The robot clicked a couple more times and then asked, "Sir, what is your IQ?"
The man answered, "Oh, about 164."
The robot then proceeded to discuss the theory of relativity, Interstellar space travel, the latest medical breakthroughs, etc. The man was most impressed.
The next day he returned, but thought he would try a different tack. The robot again asked, "What is your IQ, sir?"
This time the man answered, "Oh, about 100."
So the robot started discussing NASCAR racing, the latest basketball scores, and what to expect the Red Sox to do this weekend.
The guy had to try it one more time. So the next day he returned. Again the robot asked the question. "What is your IQ?" This time the man drawled out, " Uh.....'bout 50."
The robot clicked, then leaned close and very slowly asked, "A-r-e?? y-o-u-r?? p-e-o-p-l-e?? g-o-i-n-g?? t-o?? n-o-m-i-n-a-t-e???? H-i-l-l-a-r-y?"